Sunday, May 2, 2010

Here I go again...or do I?

Of my serious relationships, I haven't had one with a guy who was "there." He was either on his way up "there" or leaving "there." He was either looking for a job, starting new career or in school and/or didn't have a home of his own...seriously. Then without fail, once they've gotten their shit together, we break up. Seemingly after I've supported them and am ready to reap the rewards of my patience and sacrifice, I get jipped.

I wonder what that's like, to date someone who is already "there" and established.

I find myself in a similar position again. He is great guy, we have a lot in common, have fun together and can talk to each other. When we started "dating" (go with me here) he was employed, then right as we decide to serious, he loses his job and moves away to begin a new career. He says he'll be back here in a year to be with me. He's is leaps and bounds ahead of the others, he owns his home where he's moved and in just the few weeks he's been gone, he's already accomplished some things to indicate his seriousness about coming back to me, plus he makes an effort to communicate with me everyday.

I've helped, supported, encouraged so many men, only to be left with memories and unfulfilled promises and dreams. Do I dare give it one more shot? Do I yet again put energy into building someone else up? Do I get my hopes up again for yet another possibility?

I once read: 'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

Yep, I'm going for it.